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Archive for April, 2016

A Broken Road

Hello all, as you know I have been MIA for quite a while. I am so sorry about that, sometimes I don’t write anything for a long time and then I just write a billion things so I just post as it comes.

So, in the last year, I have graduated university, fallen in love, back-packed through Europe, lost that love, and finished post-graduate studies. I am now job-hunting like crazy for something in my field while also attempting to mend my heartbreak.

I have only fallen in love one other time before this, and I thought that that was bad, but this is turning out to be much worse. It’s worse because it’s subtle. It’s like a constant ache I have in my chest. With the last, it came in waves and then I would forget and go about my merry day. This time, I never forget. I can’t eat, I can’t sleep, I can barely breathe or stand up straight or concentrate on what’s in front of me. I feel angry at everything and everyone and I just feel like nobody cares about me, I feel like nobody is here for me when I need them the most, and the one person who I know would be here for me in a heartbeat no matter what is just gone out of my life and it’s all my fault.

This is the first thing I have written in about a year. I can’t really call it art but I think it’s still worth something.

~~~~~I am sorry that I loved you. I am sorry that I pursued you, made you love me forced you to love me then broke your heart. I am sorry that all I ended up being for you was a waste of time. I am sorry that I am a jerk who is selfish and does not think. I am sorry that I am only looking out for myself. I’m sorry that we didn’t work out. I’m sorry that we didn’t make it. You are the man that I want to want to keep on loving.~~~~~

 

xo

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