Archive for May, 2012

She waited ‘till the hallways were dark, the adults were asleep, and silence was the only noise before slipping on her shoes and tip-toeing out her bedroom door.

Her parents’ bedroom door hung open slightly as she made her way past it. She bit her lip and edged down the long, spiral staircase. She felt like it was a labyrinth of steps, leading her away from him.

Finally, she made it to the main floor and looked around. The cats were asleep on the couch, and the silvery moonlight cascaded through the tall living room windows and glistened against the hard wood floors.
She crept along to the front entrance.

She could feel the wood frame of the house breathing under her; contracting, and expanding, as she placed her hand atop the door handle.

She held her breathe as she unlocked the door and slowly pulled it open.

The streetlights began streaming in as she pulled the door open farther, and farther.

She padded through the doorway, and froze on the front porch.

A cat meowed from behind her.

She slowly turned around to see Mr. Quibble sitting in the glow of the streetlight, licking his small paw.

She took a deep breath and waved her hand in a desperate attempt to shoo the kitty away.

The cat meowed once more, then made its way back to the couch.

She breathed a sigh of relief before slowly pulling the door shut.

She made her way down the porch steps and down the stone path leading away from her house. Then, as soon as her house was out of sight, she sprinted down the suburban street toward her forest of dreams.

When she got to the street corner across from the woods, she pulled the note from her pocket, and re-read it for the fiftieth time that night.

Dear Alice,

Please forgive me for not coming for you sooner.
I hope you don’t resent me for leaving.
Some people were after me, from whom I had to get away.
But things are calming down now, and I feel that we should meet again under the moonlight.
I have a car and some cash. It’s enough to start our lives anew.
Please meet me at the place that I have shown only to you.


She breathed in the scent of his cologne that still lingered within the paper. His small, cursive writing sang to her from the page. She knew she had no choice.

The night owls hooted ominously as she glanced over her shoulder.
The street behind her lay empty.

She swiftly crossed the street and disappeared into the forest.

The small suburban neighbourhood was once again as still as the night itself.

Once in the forest, the streetlights were blocked out by the copious amount of thick trees surrounding her. The moonlight barely shimmered through the branches.

The autumn leaves made soft, crunching noises under her feet as she warily took her steps through the forest.

Behind her she heard rustling.

She gasped and whipped her head around to see a bird jump from the branches nearby and take flight into the starry sky.

She exhaled with relief and refocused back on her path.

The smell of autumn in the air took her back to their first encounter.

He had snuck up on her as she sat on the forest floor, writing furiously in her journal about something her parents had done.

She had gasped and jumped up when she heard his footsteps crunching the crisp leaves on the ground.

She had been angry and had wanted to hit him with her journal when the root of the tree trunk had caught on her foot, and she had fallen into his wirey arms.

She remembered the first look into his eyes.

It was like taking a bath in a waterfall of deep grey. She had melted into wherever his eyes had taken her.

The loud hoot of an owl brought her out of her reverie.

She was wading deep into the forest now, far away from her suburban bubble.

Her hands grazed over the mossy trees as she went deeper still, in search of the large rock upon which they had spent many hours.

The frigid air cut across her face, her nose numb from the bitter chill.

She stumbled through some large tree roots, but caught herself before she could fall to the floor.

She took a deep breath and steadied herself before carrying on.

The moonlight was fading more and more as she retreated deeper into the forest.

It seemed the farther she went, the thicker the leaves and branches were getting.

The path ahead of her was nearly pitch black.

She stopped for a moment, and huddled against a large tree. She leaned close and squatted down as shivers ran up her spine.

Her teeth chattered as the wind blew through her hair.

Several minutes passed before she mustered up the will power to keep trudging through the woods.

She pulled her legs through the roots and the leaves; she pushed forward even when they coiled around her legs and threatened to pull her down into the darkness.

It seemed that the moonlight was all but faded, and that the forest was an abyss of perpetual darkness when she bumped into something hard. She had noticed that the trees were beginning to thin, and that she had entered a small clearing. She ran her hands over the large mass in front of her.

It was their rock.

She had made it; she had found their rock.

A large smile broke across her face as she jumped atop the rock. She laid her head down and huddled in on herself, waiting for the wind to subside.

Waiting for her lover.

She wrapped her arms around herself in an attempt to warm up.

The moonlight faded into the darkness as she fell into a slumber.

She remained alone on that rock, in her forest of dreams.

She was huddled against herself when daylight broke across the horizon, and slowly shimmered in, through the branches of the trees.


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Holding too tightly
To all that is gone
My lungs filled with silence
Heart no longer strong

The smoke blocks my path
Your face all I see
Your hand tight in mine
A lock with no key

Pulling me under
Right into the ground
Crushing my demons
Screams with no sound

Exploding in silence
Every breath filled with smog
Each grasp leads to slipping
Fading into the fog

And I lay in silence
While whispers surround
Within the dark shadows
Slowly I drown


I don’t feel like me. The me that didn’t care what she looked like or who she hung out with or how she acted. The me that didn’t compare herself to every girl that walked by her. The me that just loved life and loved to write and her poetry meant everything to her. I want to be the me who didn’t doubt everything she did because people told her that she was crazy. I know that I’m insane and that sometimes I don’t make sense but you’re supposed to love the crazy in me. I used to be so free and so spirited and so strong and I loved that girl, I loved the person I was and I never wanted to change.

I never had the self-confidence others did. I was always too shy. But that never meant I wasn’t comfortable in my own skin. Thanks for nothing.


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